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Lately I have been thinking and I have come to realize a few things.



In the last few weeks I have started to realize many things about myself. I have paid more attention to what makes me the most happiest, things that help me keep calm, and I have started to look within myself and am seeing a very different side of me.



One of the things that I have noticed is that, even though I am a very anti-social person, I love talking to people on here. This site in itself has helped me to open up a bit more. I have started to talk to random people and I have gained the courage to tell people no. Me telling someone no is a huge thing for me. Even though it is only the internet, it is still a giant step for me.



I have also found a really good way to ground myself, and that has helped me to ward off any nightmares or other issues I have been having.



Another thing I am coming to realize, is with the help of my wonderful boyfriend. I have had issues with nymphomania and lately I haven't really had the urge to pursue my normal activities regarding those feelings. I have started to need human interaction in order to get even close to being happy. That has also helped me realize the last thing.



Pain used to be really scary to me, but recently I have loved the feeling that it brings, especially during sex. I feel more alive when I get the endorphins rush and I feel more at peace with myself. It helps me stay energized and I feel more at peace with myself afterwards.



I have been curious about awakenings for a while now and I feel that now I have a better insight to myself, I can fully start to awaken to my true self.